Talk about your teachable moments...

Parents are always looking for teachable moments – those times where we can use current events and other peoples’ experiences to teach our children important lessons.  But the last two weeks have been a little overwhelming. 

First, there was the Herman Cain incident in which the presidential candidate was accused of sexual harassment.  Then there was the publication of Darrell Hammond’s book about his abuse and trauma.  And finally, the whole Penn State fiasco. 

I’m afraid to turn on the radio each morning as we’re getting ready for school.  Kids hear these stories, blush, and wonder why adults are so disgusting.  It would be one thing if this was fiction, but these are REAL stories.  Real people.  Doing really awful things.

What can we teach our children from all this? 

It boils down to eleven words, made famous by Fram Oil Filters: “You can pay me now, or you can pay me later.”

I can’t take credit for this; I once had a Sunday School teacher who used this as the theme for a compelling lesson.  The message is clear: When something is dirty, you’re going to have to clean up the mess eventually.  And the mess will be smaller if you clean it up now; if you keep covering it up and trying to make it smell better or look less disgusting, it will only get worse.

I don’t give a flip about Herman Cain – he’s a political comet whose streak is about to burn out.  I don’t know what he did or didn’t do.  But the fact that he couldn’t own up to his past with a clear message and clear conscience makes me wonder.  What he supposedly did to these women is offensive and immoral.

As for Penn State and the alleged child abuse committed by the coaching staff, that’s much worse.  These were children, not to mention at-risk children who probably wanted to trust their elders.  I try to explain to my kids that this is not only immoral, but illegal.  I don’t care how much the State College community loves Joe Paterno; if you can’t tell the authorities about abuses of this nature, you deserve a pink slip – at a minimum.  Kids: If ANYONE tries to do something to your body that is improper, TELL SOMEONE.  And Adults: You know better.  Do the right thing.

Poor Darrell Hammond, though.  He was abused and injured by his mother; he was neglected by his father, a war veteran dealing with PTSD.  He said he felt he was surrounded by evil.  Everything was scary…the very air was scary. 

"If you're injured, it changes the way you move," he says. "If you're injured, it changes the way you talk.”  He took to drugs and cutting himself to deal with his ghosts.  But bless his heart, he is dealing with it the best he can.  He’s been through years of therapy and medication, and he’s coping.  Oddly enough, this Floridian/comedian/50-something gets my vote for admiration this week.

There is always something you can do.  It may be painful, it may take years, it may make a big mess.  But you can do the right thing.